Used to be

I used to be someone who was so insecure, grumpy, stubborn, feel so unwanted and other bad things you'll never expect to meet back there. Doesnt mean all of them just rid away by now, but at least step by step along the way I start to grow up. I start to respect my self despite the minus I had, start to listen and understand more, start to compromise, start to see there are bad things which happened to let my best out.

I still remember how suffered i was back there just because I cant had the same clothes that my friends had, how envy i was to see my friend's score higher than mine in the examination, how I feel so ashamed of myself cause I'm just not that pretty yet famous as my friends could be. I kept those hatred and jealousy inside my heart and mind for me myself, as I'm too afraid yet feel so shame to tell it even to my mom and used to wrote my thoughts down into a diary and ended up with my tears which flowed heavily from my tired eyes .

I also still remember about those hardest moment in life i ever faced when I had to deal with my mom and my dad divorcement. The moment when I'm starting to question all the shit like crazy and got no answer, not even one. The moment when I went back home, and I didnt feel like i have myself belonged there. Yeah, all of those... shits which screwed me like hell.

That someone I used to be, somehow things which build me the way I am now. Tougher, Stronger, Braver, a lil bit wiser and all the better things you'll never realize crafted from tears and pains.

So guys, whatever you've been deal with or dealing with now, believe me. Nothing is ever too hard to be passed, as long as you stick to your faith and let God surround you, the way out that you look for is ahead there waiting for you to cherish it joyfully :) xoxo, @sylvialonika